'Holly-wood ' . . . if you let it.
June 24th 2007 10:14
Ever wonder what movies, movie reviewers watch when no-one’s looking?
Sure – they’ll tell you that “Beaumarchais The Scoundrel” or “Discreet Charm Of The Bourgeoisie” are classic films that should be on everyone’s hit list – or that you haven’t lived until you’ve viewed the Italian classic “A Very Old Man With Enormous Wings”.
But behind locked doors – what do these bastions of the celluloid grail really enjoy?
Perhaps it’s Xanadu, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective or Austin Powers?
Dirty Dancing would have to be up there or for pure fluff how about Forest Gump.
Then there’s the Spice Girls Movie and Ferris Buellers Day Off – and of course that cinematic brillance of the Village People and Milkshake.
Of course we’ll never really know – and perhaps its best - given the mystic that surrounds these most curious of literary creatures.
However – no matter what your taste – there are some ‘givens’ in the world of 35mm Hollywood – ‘life lessons according to the lens’.
Please feel free to add your own 'outtakes' to this heritage listed group.
1) A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
2) When faced with defusing a bomb – always choose the wire on the right.
3) No matter how many opponents you have in a martial arts fight scene – they will only ever attack you one at a time.
4) Almost anyone can land a plane – provided there is someone in the control tower to talk you through it.
5) Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it’s not necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
6) At least one pair of identical twins is born evil.
7) All cars explode on impact ...
8) When breaking into song, a full orchestra will accompany you (but be completely invisible)
9) Cars will never start when the driver is under stress.
10) The "new guy" in high school always falls, immediately for the girlfriend of the campus tough guy/sport jock.
Role the credits . . . .
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Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
Unless the villain is crafty... then he expects you to pick the green wire, which means you should cut the red one.
Unless he knows that you know he knows, so you pick the green wire.
repeat ad nauseum... (a la The Princess Bride)
Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
Good ones: Broken Lizard movies, Booty Call, Friday, Ace Ventura, Barbershop
Bad ones: National Lampoon (why, oh why?), Road trip, Old School, Wedding Crashers, etc. The shame...